Nov. 4, 2020

#140 Ed Talks pinpointing your internal conflicts


Do you have some internal conflicts that are holding you from making a change that can revolutionize everything for you? Are you in touch with them or completely unaware of them? Tune in to learn about pinpointing your internal conflicts!

 

Sign up for Weekend Qigong Meditation Class: https://tryqigong.com 

Visit us online by going to Edtalksdaily.com

--—

What is Ed Talks Daily?

The Ed Talks Daily podcast is about growth in all aspects of your life. How do you solidify a great mindset that will lead to a healthy body, healthy relationships, and an in-tune spirit? Join me on this journey to becoming the best version of ourselves. If you want a podcast that you can relate to, a podcast that will motivate and inspire you all while educating you on ways to personally develop and grow as a human being, Ed Talks Daily is for you.

 

Episode tags: internal conflicts, trauma, agoraphobia , overcome fear of leaving your house, psychological struggle within the mind, types of internal conflict, causes of internal conflict.

--- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/edtalksdaily/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/edtalksdaily/support

Transcript

all right

good morning welcome it's monday so thank you everybody for tuning in to another episode of ed talks today's episode is about pain pointing the internal conflicts so last week i talked about a lot of times it's just your internal conflicts holding you back and this week i'm going to talk about pen paint pinpointing your internal conflicts so that means finding out what they are so internal conflicts are the things that's going against what you seemingly going for so it's an internal thing that's not resolved and i'm using thing i'm going to replace thing with the actual word

that's not resolved so it conflicts what you're actually going out to do for example it's like i'm trying to lose weight i'm going to lose 30 pounds that's beautiful that's the goal but the internal conflict is if i lose weight then i'm all i no longer will be accepted by my family you get what i'm saying so that's an internal conflict or what's a different internal conflict i want to start a business that's my goal but my internal conflict is everybody i know that started a business failed so if i start a business i'm gonna fail so in your mind you're like i can't start a business but you go out you try to do it and then you're still not working out that's because there's an internal conflict that needs to be resolved all right so if you're watching live you're part of the live attendees of this podcast and if you're listening to the replay thank you for listening you're listening to another episode of ed talks daily announcement number one ed talks daily now has a website so go to edtalksdaily.com and you can listen to all of these episodes so whatever live video you sing it becomes audio then you can listen to it and text 561-510-9605 text ed talks to 561-510-9605 and then you'll be added to text messaging tribe where i send daily empowering messages also if you have like t-mobile it might say uh you can't send me a text you just have to there's actually an instruction just dm me and i'll send you the image all right that's it for the ed talks announcement thank you for being a ed talks

listener now internal conflicts when i was in college and i was like 20 i was i remember i was starting a business called flex fitness and performance and i was like i'm gonna do some great things and then in my head i was like but i have some internal conflicts i need to resolve i didn't know why i said that when i was 20 but apparently when i was 20 i was i was at a level of growth i was like okay there's some stuff i need to fix so i'd be talking about traumas the issues on your tissues the traumas and the dramas all of those things i'd be talking about also have to do with internal conflicts internal conflicts has a bond with your traumas but not necessarily the same exact thing an internal conflict can be switched with can be reversed by just um asserting the the opposite of that conflict so but a trauma have to be healed over time some i mean some people say i go to the psychotherapist and all of a sudden i'm healed i don't think so i think it comes back up over and over and then you have to keep building yourself up to be more vital so you can handle it so it doesn't happen in one time but an internal conflict you can work through it every time you notice it's stopping you right so that's the beauty of it so it has a bond with trauma but it's not the trauma it's i would say a lot of times they say change your mindset change the way you set your mind right an internal conflict is like a broken clock right change the way you set your mind but there's like uh like this got stuck in the clock right it got stuck in the gears and that's what's causing it not to move so you're working on something you're working on healing or working on being less anxious being less worried and you're like there's a block right and what can that be it doesn't have to correlate like it doesn't have to be

the same exact circumstance that the conflict is coming from so just because you have to lose weight it doesn't mean that you have a conflict with food per se you can it could be mean that you won't your weight loss your lack of losing weight is probably due to not the way that you're eating that's not the conflict but it can be the emotion that's causing the eating so the conflict is not necessarily the eating but it's the emotional that's leading to the eating so you're like okay i need to change what i'm eating and you're focused on your diet okay let me change what i'm eating i'm gonna adopt this new diet i'm gonna be strict or i'm gonna do a vegan vegetarian pescetarian no meat okay so you pick certain thing you pick it something to do but you're like okay i'm gonna work out now boom and you're doing it and it works for a few months and then you're like wow yes it works and then all of a sudden you find yourself off track now in your mind you're thinking oh i need to start a new diet or i need to start a new regimen partly true but have you stepped back to really see what the deep internal conflict is is it emotional eating right it's not just the food you don't have a per se food problem it's a better you need a better way to help your emotions flow a better way to help your emotions flow which means when we're when we feel like we need love share this video to five friends there's gonna be some people gonna need this one when you feel like we need love we crave sweet foods which means we want something sweet so love sweet when we feel like we need comfort we crave something creamy so we want a milkshake or ice cream so like we're like ice cream fits both sweet and creamy so comfort and love we get from ice cream now when we're anxious now we want some salty food you know have you ever said somebody yo you salty are you being salty when you're anxious you want some salty food now when you're hungry when you're angry you want to munch it up so you want some crunchy food so angry crunchy food and when is the salt salt anxious am i missing one

i think i got them yeah so those are the those are the different cravings so

you find yourself eating a lot of chips at night or wanting to get the bag of chips and you're thinking what's wrong with me no don't ask that question the question to ask is what's the internal conflict so the question to ask is not what's wrong with me the right question to ask is what's the internal conflict so asking what's wrong with you is not going to give you a solution or a resolution it only brings more problems because well uh i'm sure we all know what's wrong with us i know you know your mama your sister your cousin your daddy no i know you know we all know what's wrong with us we don't need us to tell us again remind us one more time what's wrong with you sir uh i thought i told you okay so we don't want a constant reminder of what's wrong with us the question is how can we get right and to get right we must figure out what is the internal conflict internal conflicts is like a pin blocking a clock from running like it should so no more clockwork because your clock you clock blocked so that's a conflict so that causes a stop you feel like you're stuck in a rut in a yeah that's really how it feels like there was a time where i was in my internal conflict but i was working through it i was conscious of it i was working through it and my internal conflict wouldn't allow me to do what i'm doing right i don't know what i was waiting for i was doing it to some extent but i don't know what credibility i was trying to find i had to realize that we are trying to be um we're trying to get something outside of us to make us worthy in reality we just gotta share our doggone self so i had an internal conflict thinking i'm not good enough yet so i never shared everything i had to offer so when you think you're not good enough you don't share yourself so i had an internal conflict blocking me from seeking opportunities to speak on stage so one day i was like no more and then that's when i started to seek out opportunities then i got opportunity to speak so i'm saying that to say unless you resolve your internal conflict the thing that you want to do you're probably not going to be doing it because something is stopping you sometimes those conflicts were conflicted or inflicted upon you by your childhood programming and now if you're a parent take this as a way to give a gift to your child of healing done before the trauma or heal them from the trauma already inflicted or healed them from the trauma passed down that you had nothing to do with it just sort of came with that dna of yours which went through thousands of years down onto you so you can use your knowing to now give your son daughter a gift a gift called less conflicts don't inflict don't inflict your internal conflict on your kids i don't have kids but i can also say don't inflict my internal conflict on my friends but i can replace friends with kids and it'll still be the same so i'm not giving you parental advice it's just common life if i know something i want to give that gift to you you give it to your kid so what's an internal conflict you might think hey you gotta always work a job that's the only way to make money now that's your own internal conflict now some people are going to say hey son you must do the same now all right uh okay

your son might be an entrepreneur in heart so don't inflict your own internal conflict on your son or daughter which means heal your own conflicts so go fix the clock right i say it is like a clock and it does get stopped now we all think that there is a clock for our lives that's predestined you know we like we were sectioning things out when we was gonna have kids get married uh start the business you know we had a schedule right i never i never got too conscious of the schedule but i had an idea of it but i learned at 19 year old that that schedule was a whole lie right because i figured out there is no schedule the schedule is you create it so here's the thing you buy yourself more time nuggets you buy yourself more time with the more internal conflicts you solve right so solving internal conflicts is worth more than gold because you buy yourself more time now it's not that you're giving yourself more life as in more years although it does have to do with more years because the more conflicts you you solve the more years you're gonna live because the wiser decisions you're gonna make so it's on both ends but i'm talking about the enjoyment of your life and also the fulfillment of your potential that's it the fulfillment of your potential so buying yourself more time looks like barrier broke down level two character is in the level two guys and then you're like okay what's the next giant i must face characters moving up it's like you ever seen super mario where you had to like escape all the turtles and the alligator thing and all those things until you get to the big giant the scary that's that's that's the point where you become you get you get to the resolution of the story now because mario is a love story his reward is a beautiful princess yours may not be a simple love story it has multiple different facets your reward is gonna be a fulfilling life let's just say that or a holistic lifestyle that's you'll be bored right so every level you br you beat what's happening is you're leving up you ever heard that leveling up but you know an internal conflict can be i need to climb the ladder of corporate to be successful or the latter right some of us are stuck in the latter mentality i'm not saying you are but some of us and you're like that's internal conflict i can solve the ladder the ladder conflict once you get past that in your mind now you're like you know what i don't need to climb the ladder i can build the building um you can build the building you see that that plant's a new seed you're like what i can build the building i don't have to climb the ladder got it so as you solve internal conflicts you change your life so everything i'm saying is to say that you buy yourself more time as you resolve all of these things that are holding your potential back so let's say you wanna you know you there's something you really wanna do and it's gonna involve going out in the midst of other people now agrophobia a form of phobia that has to do with other people and the fear of being around social environments now you're like is that an internal conflict well agoraphobia what they don't say about phobia is that is a is it's it's an accumula it's accumulation of internal conflicts unresolved all right i'm getting a little sciency don't go anywhere it's an accumulation of internal conflicts unresolved so starting from a kid you could have had a bad experience at the store which became a trauma maybe you got lost in the midst of a big a lot of big adults and that was like yo crazy he was like where's mommy and where's daddy and you're a kid so if i was a kid that happened to me that that would suck i was in new york city in los so you could have developed a fear there now that's trauma but it brings about an internal conflict that is reflected day-to-day as you just don't want to be close to people you try to stay awake and at first you can't be around them it just means you don't want to be you prefer not to be it doesn't mean you're ago you agrophobia you know it doesn't mean you got your diagnosis that or you have whatever the science terms are it doesn't mean that it just means you're you're good but it's the drama based on a trauma became an internal conflict so an internal conflict now in your life maybe as an adult you grew up and you know you're like all right i'm kind of okay i'll be around people now i got to work with them i got to deal with these people okay and then now you got to work with them so you deal with it but an internal conflict that was once a trauma watered down because you sort of have to you live with it you know how when you just say i might as well live with it so you became you numb to it so you cope with it but the coping is a conflict because now other people find you distant and don't want to especially now in corona time everybody's distant so other people find you distant now this is just an example and you're like what's going on why am i having trouble with relationships or uh building new connections or friendships maybe it's an internal conflict that was that is it was a trauma watered down to an internal conflict that's blocking you now if every day you work through the conflict you would heal part of the trauma now that conflict is not the only result of the trauma right you could have that same trauma of being a kid lost

that same trauma can inflict a lot of other conflicts right so one trauma can cause you to be multiple different types of ways but if you work through all the different conflicts then you're definitely going to heal the traumas which means you could have a a guilt trip

y'all stay on this one a guilt trip of not answering a call from your parents and you had a guilt trip for seven years it's becoming darn right traumatic now so and it's probably in conflict based on an abandonment trauma straight up psychology here take this one conflict that's the result from a trauma of abandonment so you're like i felt abandoned now i don't wanna now i'm i'm actually the doing the same thing continuating the cycle so noticing the conflict working on resolving it now you're like how do i resolve it because you're saying pain pointing it this is what it's about well you know this podcast is in part i give you this episode pain pointing next tomorrow you come resolving and then the next week become reflecting and you get what i'm saying so five days same topic different facets it's the daily ballistic class and you're tuning in to ed talks daily share this video to five friends and text 561-510-9605 so you can get empowering text messages so by pinpointing your internal conflicts it will literally change your life you're gonna level up because you're gonna beat the giants and it's gonna be um on a level of so i'm going to give you a quick overview on a couple ways on dealing with internal conflicts one of them is to deal and not to deal deal or no deal okay can't forget this ideal or no deal to deal with conflict or not to deal with them are the two solutions now you ever got in a argument and those two options this is not worth my energy or i really need to give this person a peace of mind but we can take both response and make it more compassionate one is saying uh this person is obviously in pain therefore i should be compassionate not worth my energy of combating the next one is

let me deal with this person's pain to help them become better if i can if not i will retreat deal or no deal and what does it mean to deal with someone's pain well listen to them and say i get it but don't say but i understand now i get it

see it save you a lot of life save you a lot of time now by doing that you're like what does that do deal or not to do so an internal conflict is you can either compassionately work through it when it pops up and you notice it and you're like let me prime myself out of it give you some affirmations you're not you are powerful you are consistent whatever your affirmations are you can deal with the conflict right when it pops up and you're conscious of it or you can just sit and do nothing you can just meditate and then you could disassociate from the conflict now you may say i've never experienced deep meditation yet well if you keep growing at some point you will so let this store this up for when it happens so one of them is you can sit in silence and do nothing and that will be a resolution prayer is also meditation or you could do something and use cognitive behavioral therapy for yourself that's what they call it but it just means affirming and uh what they say working through cognitive distortions and illusions okay coin term words to know now you got to become a student student somebody you want to hire somebody to fix the clock some of you been watching from the beginning you get the whole analogy you want to get somebody to fix the clock you got to get somebody who know what they're doing but here's the thing the clock gets clogged up over and over do you want to get somebody to keep coming to your mind and fixing your own clock or do you want to fix it yourself right option number two you want to be able to be your own clock fixer so fixing your mindset setting your mind setting the clock you have to learn about the clock about all types of other clocks and how they worked how the gears within them navigate how to lubricate the clock and the clock saying your mind how to lubricate your mind literally how to get more fluid in your brain how to release stagnation learning about your body makes you now you're your own clock worker whatever the clock person who fixes clocks is called

so you learn it now you can apply it to yourself okay so i've been learning i've learned i've been learning this stuff i've been doing the stuff that doesn't pay but they paid me i didn't like i didn't know that spending like eight hours a day reading and studying was as valuable as going to work for eight hours a day

i won't let that one sink in i didn't know spending eight hours a day with self-study was just as benef if not way more beneficial than working eight hours a day and way more beneficial than going to school for eight hours

and at the time i'm thinking what am i doing with my life i must be doing something wrong and people was judging me and saying you need to get a job at who are you going to be motivational speaker health coach trainer speaker guy come on that's not a real description get a job if i had a dollar no if i had a hundred dollars for every time i heard that one

even when i had a business even when i had four businesses people told me to get a job i was like but i just made a thousand dollars selling books get a job i'm like really come on but and i was like i know i you struggle sometimes but that's business have you not read the story so at some point you're gonna invest in yourself and i'm not telling you to be broke i'm just telling you at some point you're going to be working on yourself and the knowledge is going to make you money your knowledge is worth more than money because it's going to add time to your life because you're going to enjoy life more and you're gonna stay healthier so the secret that's not really a secret because you're gonna know it now is that your level of enjoyment also dictates the length of your life not just the enjoyment it's not a bug

so the more you enjoy life the longer you live the more you laugh the longer you live the more you are feeling satisfied and fulfilled the longer you're going to live and the more life you're going to have why you live because you're actually going to be alive let's say most people are tiptoeing their way to the graveyard don't be most people and you're not because you're investing in yourself your personal growth and development only the people who are serious about healing listens to me talk by that i mean nobody sits through somebody's live video or podcast unless they're serious about growing and learning something new and thinking differently and seeing where they're coming from because we accumulate our own knowledge base and we know things already and some of us have more experience than others as in life experience more age i'm 25. so some of you are older than me some younger so you've learned other things some of you had degrees that i don't some of you have knowledge about things that i do not but i never look at somebody's uh i look at yo what light is this person putting out there and how can i like yo can i can i like look at this light can i be part of it can i check it out can i see what it's about and then you know does it resonate does it not that's how we live life so the people who think they would know it all those people are the number one fools that's why i never say i know it all and i'll be saying i'll be telling people don't take my word for it because when i do the podcast i always get more from it than i give now you're like what so this podcast has been this morning i was thinking to myself i was like yo the podcast has been changing my life first i realized that i used to do it once a week at in college when i got a chance to have a radio show and i was like ed talks daily i started three years ago on college campus and every week i did a podcast that would play in what they would say the breezeway and the radio and i had a show on the tv so i had a show an fau tv and an hour our radio so i'd be doing a podcast daily and i'd be being in a subject i'd be talking about my life the struggles and how i'm overcoming my fit like how like i felt accounting three times and i and i passed it and how like i'm homeless in college and i was homeless and how i worked through it so i had a radio show all about that right so and i started it daily no weekly and in march i started doing a podcast daily that's why it's called ed talks daily and every time i bring a project i would think what is it that i need to work on and i would just set up everything sit in front of the camera and then i would say when i have the topic the thing i need to work on like it is like i need to plan better this week i need to redirect my focus i need to be more stop procrastinating and lead to action so i'm bringing the subject based on a what i need to work on and then other times i would ask my friend for instance during that time i was around deja a lot so it's like asia what are you working through right now they should be like hey i am i need help scheduling this so i'd say boom that's that's the podcast and then i'd sit here and because i i know that yo everything that i've sit and meditated all the things when i sat down and all the podcasts i've done before and how i flowed never lost words so i have automatic faith every time i sit here that i'm not gonna say anything that's gonna make your life worse and because i'm confident in that i'd always channels through me and then i would just come sit here and i would start talking about that subject and then i would just be saying quotes and statements and i would bring psychology concepts that i read from book in 2013 i'd be like well i still remember that and then i would bring all of these science and and psychology and stories in my life experience and i was like whoa where is all this stuff coming from i had no idea that when you learn you learn and it's hard to just say okay what did you okay we know when you need everything you learn you can't sit down and say hey bring up everything you learn right now and solve my problems

your mind goes blank it doesn't work because i tried doing it i was like i'm reading all this stuff how do i pick them out how do i pick them out my brain and put them out and i so i would do this i would really do this i'm not telling you anything made up this is truth and i would be like okay bring everything you know

if i ever say think everything you know right now i'm i'm stuck it's too much it's an overload so what i discovered about everything you're learning is that you are your own guru but you're only as wise as what you've been exposed to so as you change your level exposure your level of wisdom evolve so you can only change your life up until the wisdom you've acquired or up until the person you became which means there are some things that you you know now that's that's going to evolve you're going to get you to another level but you probably need to know more to get to that next level and that next level and you probably need to sit in silence because there's two ways of knowing okay a way of knowing is reading learning listening consuming and then the other way is downloading there are different like that's how einstein's come up with these theories that become like whoa a law so how do a man with a theory discover a law created by god i want you to think about this question how does a man with a theory discover a law created by god well god must whisper to his ears at night so they're all taking god's work for credit for god's work that's why i try to don't try do that's why i always say don't give me credit for this i'm just a vessel so two ways of learning you read the books you acquire knowledge or you just let god use you you just flow but you can't be full of the spirit if you're full of view and what do i mean by that people who are full of themselves are stuck in their personality and in their image and they're not letting their true essence come out so let your spirit rule your body more than your persona do right your spirit gotta rule your body not your persona your attitudes your looks your booty but your true beauty you get what i'm saying not your pecs or your abs or your good looks right i mean that's that's cool you know you got a bless you got blessing you can't be full of the spirit if you're full of you and what that mean is if you're god is trying to use you your ego is trying to take the spot you know how you gonna get used the ego can't take the spot that god is trying to use so that's what i'm i've been learning so that's why i learned to humble myself every time the more i hit i fill up my head the more air i have in there and the less wisdom i become an airhead so that's my message and i'm sticking to it it's the holistic motivator and i want to thank you for listening to this episode of ed talks daily if a minute of this added value to your life then think about how many times you can get more value ed talksdaily.com let me comment it down right there just go to the website and subscribe okay this is going to be the number one podcast in the world is gonna be number one

right so everything starts somewhere all right but it's not about being number one the podcast is not about being number one you know what it's about what i realize is alexa my podcast i was like bro

don't lack in applying these things constantly bro because first i used to read all the time to find all the solutions then i realized reading is not for the solutions it's simply for the structure so you can build your special specialized solution right knowledge is their tools for you to apply but it's when you learn how to navigate through it yourself so you if you claim to be spiritual but your spiritual your spirituality does not bear your own fruits that you can plant and reap from then are you spiritual or are you just picking off apples off some other spiritual tree are you the tree or are you picking up apples okay think about that think about it you must start to bear fruits so your own thoughts are amazing if you cultivate them well sometimes some i sit down a lot and i come up with quotes that and then y'all see it on instagram so how many quotes you've thought of but did you you don't have to post them but did you note them because now because this is exactly what i do right i'm given the privilege of my profession merging with my growth right so not only do i get to do the work the work that i'm doing is the work thank god so i get to do the chi gong and breathe and everything that i'm doing that's useful and growing and that's helping me grow and do everything is what i show now you might not be doing the same exact profession maybe you're not a coach you're not a speaker you don't teach people fitness or meditation or qigong

so you have another profession so you're like i'm doing this for myself and my family however i still have another craft that i that i do so you know it's not easy for me to just put this all in and practice because my days get interrupted and you know i don't have that time to breathe and you can merge it you can merge everything i've ever suggested right you could be like well i don't have time to make the juice well is there a fridge in your job do you have 20 minutes the night before or the morning to just juice it if you click the link in my bio there's a juicer 79 an investment to your life just from amazon

and you're like well i can't juice okay well what's the internal conflict stopping you i don't eat vegetables what's the internal conflict stopping you why don't you eat did you hate broccoli as a kid and now you hate it forever i can't believe i used to dislike watermelon because i had one that wasn't that sweet and it just tasted like it had no flavor and i from then i just said no watermelons ever and then at some point i was like that water watermelon got that yummy yum referring to that real video that i did

yeah so that watermelon is really good anyways i'm like bro you see we based our lives on the conclusion that we came up with when we was five so stop doing that i'm learning and i'm applying so take it and make it your own that's my message and i'm sticking to it i'm not going to tell you how to text me anymore you do it or you don't remember you have the unlimited power in you to achieve whatever it is that you want first you got to believe it in order to achieve it and until that happens the world will forever miss all your talents all your gifts and all the great things that you have to offer so remember let your light shine don't hide it don't damn it it's the holistic motivator and i want to thank y'all for watching what wait wait that's it oh maybe

all right peace y'all share this video the replay is up for 24 deleted and then you can listen to it on the podcast but then the videos i'm going to put them up on patreon because yeah that's it but if you want to know more info just let me know i'm only a dm in a text message away

all right

you